Elimination Communication Resources.

Some books:

Diaper Free: The Gentle Wisdom of Natural Infant Hygiene. (I really want to read this one! I'm going to see if Half Price Books has it. They carry lots of books for crazy moms like me.)

The Diaper-Free Baby: The Natural Toilet Training Alternative.

Infant Potty Basics: With or Without Diapers.

Websites:

Elimination Communication: Wiki page (This just has basic info and some sources.)

http://www.diaperfreebaby.org/ (One of the best resources!)

Diapers Not Required? ABC article

Introduction to Elimination Communication (There's a list of resources and links at the bottom too.)

Elimination Communication Yahoo Group

My kid acting goofy:

One of my chickens acting goofy:

This is frequently in my nightmares, and it sleeps in my bed.

And...why my house is constantly destroyed. Man-cat love.

Unpotty Training.

One thing I'm excited about for this new baby is elimination communication.

I wish I'd learned about it sooner when Rosie was a baby! I noticed as an infant that she would always pee as soon as I took her diaper off for naked time, but for some reason it never occurred to me to take her to the potty as a baby.

When she was 9 months old I read about elimination communication and decided to try it. I got her a little potty and started sitting her on it at times when I knew she had to pee, like when she first woke up from sleeping. She would always pee right away! Then I discovered that if I was quick, I could sit her on the potty right before she pooped. And soon she started regularly sitting on the potty and holding her pee and poops for it. I would leave the potty out in the living room and she would play on it and sit on it and use it frequently.

Rosie went through a small phase during a few months right after her first birthday where she wanted absolutely nothing to do with her little potty. I think she was too busy walking and learning new skills to focus on going potty, so I didn't force it. I just left the potty sitting out, and made sure to change her prefold as soon as it got wet or pooped in. Since we were practicing elimination communication instead of potty training, there wasn't any pressure...she didn't *have* to use the potty, but she had the option open to her and could choose it if she wanted.

At 15 or 16 months Rosie woke up one morning and refused to put a diaper on. At all, ever again. And she started using the little potty again reliably all day long!

It took another couple of months before she could go without a diaper overnight, that was hit or miss depending on how soundly I was sleeping. We would sneak a diaper on her once she fell asleep at night because she wouldn't willingly let us put it on her. When she had to pee at night she would start thrashing around and crying out in her sleep and if I realized it, I could carry her to the potty and hold her over it. But I didn't always realize in time, so she would wake up crying after she peed.

The thing I love about elimination communication is how simple it is. You just encourage your child to be naturally clean instead of training them to pee on themselves in a diaper. How logical. Did you know babies are born with a natural sense of cleanliness? That's why it's called elimination communication--every baby has signals they make before they pee or poop, it's just a matter of being in tune enough to recognize them in time.

Outside of Western nations, most countries around the world don't even use diapers. When I first realized that I was kind of shocked. It never occurred to me that there was any other way but diapers! In places like China and all over Asia they use crotchless baby pants so that they can just pop the pants open and potty the baby whenever the baby needs to go. In Africa they wear babies in slings and can feel the baby squirm when it needs to go, so they take it out of the sling and hold it in the bushes or over a little bowl to go potty. If the baby accidentally pees in the sling, they wash everything off, hang it to dry, and continue on with their day. There's no shame for the baby or toddler, there's no disappointment from the caregiver. Every non-industrialized nation around the world has a method of helping babies stay clean that does not involve diapering, methods that have been in places for hundreds of years, if not thousands or longer.

In some ways elimination communication is a huge relief. You don't have to worry about potty training because you never train your child to use a diaper in the first place, so they don't have to unlearn peeing in their pants. No sticker charts or rewards, no fights, no huge toddler potty messes, no fear of the toilet to contend with. Your child never feels pressured, and never feels as if you are upset or disappointed. Sometimes there are still accidents, but it's not a big deal because it's just that--an accident, or a miss.

Elimination communication is the very opposite of potty training. It's not a goal, instead it's a mindset--helping your baby stay clean and dry. Unlike the pressure that comes with potty training, elimination communication builds trust between the parent and baby. The baby learns to trust that the parent will be there to fully meet its needs, including its need to go potty. It forces you to pay attention to your child and their cues, which in turn opens up all kinds of lines of communication that will likely last well beyond babyhood.

You don't see people in the West helping babies pee in public or even in a public bathroom. For some reason that's taboo. (Though if a dog pees on a bush outside that's not inappropriate, right?) Instead for babies you have dirty changing tables and stinky trash cans full of poop filled diapers which then go on to sit in landfills...People in America are too busy to help their babies go potty, too busy to notice the cues. It's so much easier to just let your baby learn to use a diaper, and to buy diapers that are the most absorbent so that you don't have to bother changing it as often. I think the idea of elimination communication is very overwhelming when you first hear about it. But it turns out, it's really not that difficult once you try it. It's a lot easier than wiping poop from every tiny crevice of a baby's behind. It's a lot easier than buying or washing diapers. Since there is no pressure involved, you catch what poops and pees you are able to. Rosie wore a prefold without a cover a lot of times so that any missed pees or poops didn't create a huge mess, and at the same time I was able to realize she needed to be changed almost instantly. Sometimes she just went without a diaper, since we have all hardwood floors. It wasn't hard to quickly clean up any missed pees. A lot of times she would realize she was starting to pee and scream for the potty or run to it herself.

I'm so excited about starting elimination communication from the beginning with the new babe! Rosie is excited too. She keeps pointing to the little potty, currently stored in the garage, and asking if we can get it out and clean it off so that the new baby can use it.

There are several books about elimination communication, but I haven't read any of them yet. I might get one, just out of curiosity. It seems so simple though, I don't know what I would get from a book on the subject.

I found a documentary that is 20 minutes long and pretty interesting. Rosie liked it, haha. We just watched it. You can watch it here.

LOL.

I found a clip of this online!

This was the top news story on the local news last night.

<3 Kentucky.

Click to watch.

It's worth the 50 seconds it takes to watch it! LOL.

Sinking in...

I think I am still in shock that it's a girl.

For everyone who couldn't see anything...I made a labeled picture.

The ultrasound tech said that she is fairly certain it's a girl since we saw 3 lines and no sign of a penis anywhere.

Obviously in the little circle on the ultrasound photo there is not a penis poking up!

Since we only got a glimpse of it though, we are going back the day after Thanksgiving. Hopefully the baby will be in a different position and we can get a better look at all of her parts, especially in between the legs!

I'm so excited about having two little girls! They will have so much fun together. Rosie will love having someone to argue with, and play dress up and dolls with, and when she gets older she will have a sister close in age to go through life with.

We do have a couple names in mind, but I don't think I want to share them anytime soon.

Last time we made the mistake of sharing Rosie's name with family because we were excited.

MIL insisted that Rose Mae sounded like a stripper's name. She also said that Rosie would hate us because she was named after Rosie O'Donnell and all the kids would make fun of her.

Yeah, sure.

Actually she's named after my great-grandma who I loved dearly. And Tyler chose the name!

Then once Rosie was born they all came to the hospital and wouldn't leave...they stayed for the entire day after Rosie was born and never let me hold her or gave me a second alone to nurse her or get up out of bed and pee...It was horrible. I had lost a lot of blood and felt too weak to insist that they leave or to insist they give me my baby back, and Tyler kept thinking if he ignored them and fell asleep they would take a hint and leave. But really...they don't take hints.

And of course while they were there they kept reminding us since we had yet to sign the birth certificate it wasn't too late to pick a better name.

Seriously, who has the balls to say that??

It's not as if we were naming her Orangello or something.

I can't even describe how rude and inconsiderate it felt.

So, based on that, we are terrified to share any name choices.

MIL asks about it in a sing-song voice all the time. She already tried to grill Rosie on the baby's name more than once. Tyler's Granny has already made numerous suggestions. She thinks we should name the baby Katie Jordan, and she continues to suggest it over and over.

Um...no thanks.

I'm so thankful that my family doesn't care. If we name the baby the strangest name in the world they would still go along with it.

We can't seem to find any name we love that goes well with our last name. Amos doesn't sound good with ANYTHING! There is either an A sound or an S sound messing up the flow of the name. So I have given up. I'm not going to worry about the first and last name sounding good together...it's ruining the names Tyler and I want to use! And my daughter will probably get married one day and change her last name anyway...

I will give you a hint and tell you that her initials *might* be AMA.

Maybe.

Mhm.

Tyler wants to name her after his Grandma, but her first name is Frieda and...I just can't do it. It doesn't feel like this baby's name. So we are using her middle name for the baby's middle name. It's not a name I would have ever considered, but I do love his grandma and I like the idea that Rosie is named for my great-grandma and this baby would carry the memory of Tyler's Grandma.(His Grandma is not the same person as his Granny, just to be clear...)

Rosie loves it when we use the iMac to take pictures of my belly. The Mac photos are a reflection just like when you take a picture in the bathroom mirror.

She wanted to take pictures yesterday. So I guess these are 18 week pictures!

We're home from the ultrasound and...

We're home after eating lunch out.

My baby is cute.

<3

Head and a hand:

Sucking the thumb:

Profile with the mouth open:

Top of the head and face, arms on the sides. You can see stuff floating in the amniotic fluid.

The baby was just relaxing in there and waving fingers up and down.

Still shots from the short video:

That thing on the left side of the face is the umbilical cord.

Here is a shot of in between the legs:

What do you see?

Well apparently all you see is a big fat umbilical cord!

The cord is wrapped around the knee and looped down in front of the crotch area, then it goes upwards across the face to the placenta located above baby's head.

Yep.

My baby has an umbilical cord.

So finally the baby kicked the cord off of the leg...

And put a hand over the crotch.

And held it there.

For a very, very, very long time.

A very long time.

I got up and moved, squished my belly around, jumped up and down, etc.

Then we checked again.

This is what we saw:

A baby!

Not just any baby, but my stubborn baby laying so that from no angle possible you can see between the legs.

But...

Then the baby rolled over for one split second and there was a flash of...

This.

An odd angle. You can't see the legs, there are just nubs where the legs should be due to the ultrasound angle.

So do you see it?

Yes? No? Maybe so?

Well if not...

Here's the same picture with a little clarification!

!!!!!!!!!!

11/13/09

Two things.

1) I finally met the new neighbors. (Well they've been here quite a few months now, I guess technically they aren't exactly new anymore. But they aren't the old neighbors, so they are new.)

Downside: I haven't showered in eternity, I look like I have a huge beer belly, and I was wearing glasses and no makeup. Oh and I have horrifying pimples. The neighbor is around my age, which makes it a bit more embarrassing.

Upside: He is extremely friendly. He thinks the chickens are funny and said not to worry if they hop into his yard. Told him about the anonymous complainer and he said it definitely is not them and they think the chickens are interesting and like them. His dog is named Rosie. And he volunteers at the local animal shelter and loves all kinds of animals, he's especially passionate about rescuing dogs. He asked me a lot of questions about my rescued dogs! He is the type of person I would click with and spend time chatting and hanging out with.

So this made my day.

Now thing #2.

Ultrasound is tomorrow morning. I have butterflies of nerves and excitement! I'm not going to be able to sleep.

The ultrasound is at 11 in the morning. Rosie and Tyler are going.

I can't announce the sex of the baby though, because Tyler wants to wait until Thanksgiving to tell his relatives. We'll see if we can make it to Thanksgiving without it slipping out. I'll announce it on my blog after Thanksgiving.

I'm telling my family right away.

Can you believe it's TOMORROW.

Surreal, I keep telling you.

Not only is it a real live baby, but it has a beating heart. And now it kicks. Next thing you know it's going to have sex organs. Then it will have a name, and a personality, and and and...

It will be REAL.

Wow.

I'm going to lay in bed and watch Food Inc. It finally came from Netflix yesterday, I'm excited to see it. Hopefully it will be distracting.

Mhm.

I'm so thrilling lately. I have nothing of interest to write about, but at the same time I like to write just for myself so that when I look back a few years from now I can remember how I was feeling and what was going on. Even though right now nothing seems significant, you never know how it will all piece together and turn out in the end.

Mhm.

I made major progress on the trashed house front today. Don't get me wrong--it's still a disaster. But I organized the mountain of dirty laundry! That took a long time. I now have blue jeans, bright colors/Rosie's clothes, solid white things that I am going to bleach to death because Tyler has stained them with mud (dog feet) and god knows what else...have to resort to bleach because I can't afford to throw them away and just buy new ones. Sorry environment...? And I also have a pile of dark clothes. This totals about 943 million loads. Today I folded and put away two huge loads and there are clothes in the wash right now and clothes in the dryer.

I also cleaned out Rosie's room and our bedroom. It's horrifying how trash can collect when I am not picking it up everyday. I've been sick for almost four months now.

Then I vacuumed, because well...the Feline Pine cat litter did not work out as planned. It's like saw dust. Saw dust that sticks to cat fur. My ENTIRE house (all hardwood) has been coated in pine shavings.

*sigh*

I got a great measure of satisfaction sucking that all up with the vacuum cleaner hose.

(See how thrilling my life is? I told you.)

Tomorrow my goals are to take a shower, do more laundry, and call the OB's office and request a copy of my records so that I can go over them with the (homebirth) midwife on the 18th. I also need to get my hospital records and Rosie's hospital records from her birth. I keep forgetting to call and ask them!

I am having major chicken issues. They have all taught each other how to climb the fence.

So frustrated.

Very, very, very pregnant hormonally angry and frustrated.

Tyler is refusing to help me fix their pen or their coop, or help me clip their wings. Of course.

I am considering hiring someone to build a walk in pen with a roof. I'm not sure how much it would cost, but I know it wouldn't be hard to build. Tyler could build it if he really wanted to help me. I might consider trying it myself (we have the tools!) but I can see about 10,000 ways that I would injure my pregnant body constructing a frame of 6.5 foot tall wooden posts using a circular saw and a nail gun and a staple gun.

Let's be honest here. I am accident prone on a good day. I've come to terms with it.

I'm thinking of how wonderful a walk-in pen would be..basically like a gigantic screened in rectangle with a screen door and their coops inside of it. They could never escape. Hawks could never swoop down and eat them. My stupid dogs would stop sneaking in and eating the chicken poop and their feed and then getting horrifying diarrhea. (I'm sure you didn't want to know that, but it has been a real problem recently. Pregnant+gagging+liquid dog poo randomly shooting out of a 65 pound dog on your kitchen floor=bad, bad start to the morning. Trust me.)

I've seen walk-in pens at farms we've visited, but they were on a smaller scale. Mine would need to be something like 20x30 feet in perimeter and 6.5 feet tall. I might call a handy man tomorrow and see if he can do something like that for fairly cheap. I think the wood will be what costs the most...why is wood so expensive?? There are some scrap lumber yards around here but I need it to look decent and not like a piece of shit gigantic cage randomly erected in my yard. Hah. If I lived in the country I wouldn't care and would be using all the scrap wood I could get, but since I have neighbors....yeah.

This is what I have in mind, only a bit larger as it would need to contain two 4x4 foot coops and all of their roaming space...I hope this is logical.

I think a handy man could build that fairly easily, don't you? To be larger it might need support posts in the middle or something, or possibly I could just use light weight nylon screen across the top...but maybe that would sag...and this is why I am not building it myself....

You know, if it is high enough for the birds to not fly out of it maybe it doesn't need a top. The hawks can still swoop but that's no different from how it is now and we're surviving ok.

Yeah.

So I'm going to eat some cookie dough and go to bed.

Oh by the way, something crazy happened.

Remember, I just took the picture on the left a few days ago. The one on the right is from tonight.

I'm telling you all, this is a difference of what, like five days? I need to go back and look at the date from the picture on the left.

No wonder my belly muscles are throbbing!

(PS: Please to ignore hysterically over tired child on the right.)